[Fanmix] Reborn - Xanxus - Dear Father

[ishime]

This one has been waiting a cover for MONTHS.
I asked sakoni to draw a fanart for it, but she hasn't started it yet, and last night I took it and wrote fic to go with the track list, so I really didn't feel like waiting anymore.
So here. Have a PRE CRADDLE AFFAIR XANXUS FANMIX about his TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE RELATIONSHIP WITH HIS DAD.
Also known as HOW MUCH TIMOTEO SUCKS AT BEING A DAD. The answer to that question is: A FUCKING LOT.

Disclaimer:
Reborn! and its characters belong to Amano.
Warnings:
Crappy cover art.
This mix works with my headcanon that Xanxus is actually human. You know, deep down, under all his RAGE.
And that Timoteo is one hell of a shitty father.
Also there's a LOT of swearing in the drabbles. That's Xanxus' POV for you, haha...

DEAR FATHER a Xanxus to Timoteo fanmix (From before he met his dad to the Craddle Affair) 1. Sum 41 - Dear Father (son of nobody)
Address this letter to Dear Father I know you as complete unknown I guess it's better you don't bother All our truths should be left alone You're out there somewhere I don't know if you care at all It seems that you don't It's as if the day will never come So you remain a complete unknown	She speaks to you, of this man your FATHER and you don't know him (you're not sure you WANT to) (because all the other boys have dads that pick them up at school and teach them cool stuff, and come on you with low, angry voices when you trash their stupid brats) (and where was YOUR dad when they were trashing you down to protect their whiny sons) but then you get angry and you have the FLAME and she smiles because when he sees it, he will take you.
2. 12 Stones - It Was You (meeting Timoteo)
So how can I make this up to you? I'll fight and I'll push and I'll strive Now that I'm living my life for you I'll fight and I'll push and I'll strive Can't you see? It was you That showed me who I am And taught me how to stand For what I know is real	And then you meet him and There's no mistake. You are my son. he wraps his scarf around your neck (you don't understand why) (you're not a whiny piece of shit like the other boys) (but) you have a FATHER and he takes you to his house (it's huge) and he gives you a room with plushies and toys and you don't like them not really but you have a FATHER and he smiles and pats your head (and you're happy) and you promise yourself you're gonna make him PROUD.
3. Marilyn Manson - Sweet Dreams (the Mafia)
Sweet dreams are made of these Who had a mind to disagree? Travel the world and the seven seas Everybody's looking for something Some of them want to use you Some of them want to get used by you Some of them want to abuse you Some of them want to be abused	And then you realize the house of your dad is full of men in black, black suits with knives and guns and sharp, sharp smiles (and sometimes) (sometimes there's BLOOD on their black suits) and they all smile at you son of Vongola but their smiles are cold and you can hear them whispering in your back of bastards and shame on the family name (and of taking care of the problem) (with BULLETS or maybe POISON) and you bite your cheeks to hide that you are so, so very SCARED because you realize now what sort of FAMILY you're a part of.
4. Three Days Grace - The Good Life (adapting)
I don't really know Who I am It's time for me To take a stand I need a change And I need it fast I know that any day Could be the last All I want is a little of The good life All I need is to have A good time The good life	And you're scared, scared, scared and you know that there is NO WAY OUT now (son of Vongola) but you won't let yourself be toyed with (not by the other kids, not by their dads, not by any mafia trash) you will become tougher STRONGER (you imagine them as kids, with their filthy rich family) (and you laugh, because) (you know they must have been squealers) (whiny little shits, the whole lot of them) you will become the fiercest mafioso of them all (make your father PROUD) you'll have everything (while you still can) you're used to fighting for what you need it's not so different.
5. Hoobastank - Never There (all alone)
You were supposed to see All the signs I left to read in front of your face You were supposed to be The closest thing to being me But you're the furthest away That's because Every time that i need you around You're never there (never there) You're never there (never there) Because in my life is where i need you now But you're never there (never there) You're never there (never there) You're never there And I doubt That I will ever find out If there's a way to get out Of feeling all alone Cause lately I've been thinking Maybe That no one's going to save me I'll do it on my own	It's not different not different at all because you may have a father now but he's always busy (and he has a WIFE and LEGITIMATE SONS to spend his spare time with) and he comes by to scold you when you break the walls and to pat your head when you learn how to shoot (you're better than any of your BROTHERS) but he doesn't see he doesn't UNDERSTAND and he always scolds you for fighting says you don't need to because all these loosers should be your FAMILY (does family whisper behind each other's back?) (does family spit on the ground each other walks?) and you realize having a father isn't so different when your father NEVER understood you at all.
6. The Exies - F.S.O.S. (the Vongola bastard)
Attention, attention everybody look at me Stand up, stand up, I need your belief Rejection, rejection always seems to follow me Head down, I need some relief Some days I bleed, I fall like stone I'm always afraid, I feel so alone, Got a false sense of security Giving me a real sense of insecurity Messing with my head now, head down What the fuck is wrong with me A false sense of security Is fucking with my head	Nobody trully stands against you son of Vongola but you can feel them STARING at your neck and you can hear them hissing when you pass by (son of a whore, they call you) and you know you KNOW that if they have the smallest chance they'll take you DOWN like the animal they claim you are but you won't LET them and so you BEAT THEM ALL DOWN (weak whiny useless trash) and you're scolded (your father is so ASHAMED of you) (stupid old man) (can't he open his eyes and SEE) this is not a family this is Family (watching your every move) (waiting to stab you in the back) and you're just fighting to come out on TOP.
7. Marilyn Manson - Wormboy (the truth)
Oh no, it is everything they said it was Oh no, I am all the things they said I was Oh no, it is everything they said it was Oh no, I am all the things they said I was When you you get to heaven you will wish you're in hell When you you get to heaven you will wish you're in hell	Son of a whore they call you and you don't CARE you know you are son of Vongola you have the FLAME to prove it (and all the others are dead now) (nobody in your way to the Don's chair) but then you are told that your FLAME (it can appear outside the Family) it PROVES NOTHING and you don't CARE but it could be a problem later when you take your inheritance (you need PROOF) so you go to your Father's study and you look for the papers and it is all here PROOF that they were RIGHT you are NOBODY'S SON (trash, trash, TRASH) and you can fight all you want (win all the stupid things) but never get what you WANT.
8. Billy Talent - Try Honesty (festering anger)
I'm insane, it's your fault, so sly Your well of lies ran dry And I cut the cord, free fall From so high we seem so small' Forgive me father, why should you bother? Try honesty, try honesty Hop in your dump-truck, reverse for good luck Ride over me, ride over me Take on the whole world, fight with the young girls Die tragedy, die tragedy Call me a cheapskate, come on for Pete's sake Cry agony, cry agony	And your first is BURNING your flame more powerful than it ever was (and you're not even proud) because you're so SO ANGRY because why why why WHY WHY WHY did he LIE to you let you BELIEVE give you FALSE HOPE (all your strength, all you cunning, everything you've done) (all the fighting) (for nothing, NOTHING) WHY did he TAKE you (couldn't let a sky flame grow out of the FAMILY, could he) and WHY did he PRETEND CALL YOU HIS SON when you're NOBODY (just FUCKING TRASH) (no better than all these PIECES OF SHIT you were laughing at) JUST SOME PATHETIC SCUM HE PICKED OFF THE STREET.
9. Nickelback - Burn It To the Ground (hostile take-over, Varia style)
Well it's midnight, damn right, we're wound up too tight I've got a fist full of whiskey, the bottle just bit me Oh That shit makes me bat shit crazy We've got no fear, no doubt, all in balls out We're going off tonight To kick out every light Take anything we want Drink everything in sight We're going till the world stops turning While we burn it to the ground tonight Oh	And this time the anger doesn't just explode it doesn't burn itself out the flame keeps burning burning BURNING you inside out and you feel so fucking CALM when you decide FUCK IT these things they waved in front of your nose toying with you (like a fucking dog) never intending to give you anything you'll TAKE IT ALL you're used to fighting to get what you want It's not different at all so tonight you call your dogs (the ones they call RABID) and you come down on their pretty fucking mansion you carve your name on it with flame impacts and paint it all with BLOOD.
10. Seether - No Jesus Christ (confronting Timoteo)
Before you hedge those bets you placed against me Be reticent of fortunes they foretell Your verbal defecation i can't wash away despite myself Your vanity, it seems, has served you well You're so quick to choose the path walked by the righteous So you can go and nest among the weak The innocent observers will refuse to find the lie within Renew the disappointment of the meek You're no Jesus Christ! You're no Jesus Christ!	And then you find him (or maybe he finds you) and he looks at you disappointment in his eyes and you feel your RAGE burn on your fists and you let it EXPLODE right at his face (Iemitsu asked me not to kill you) (but I cannot let you live) HAH! (showing his TRUE COLORS at last) (still he dares, he DARES ASK YOU WHY) so you spill it all to his face let's be done with all your lies, old man (who did you think you were) all these years PRETENDING to be my FATHER (taking me to your house like some fucking stray) (expecting me to stay in my PLACE) (like a good dog) (WHO DO YOU THINK I AM?) and you just roar I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU and he puts on his sorry face I'm sorry everyone he says I have to do this after all (hah!) listen to poor Timoteo he's such a fucking SAINT apologizing to everyone (everyone BUT YOU).
11. Sum 41 - The Bitter End (the ice)
there's no doubt in my mind when it's over what is done will be you will find when life gets colder there's no sympathy there's no point trying you can't escape the bitter end well who will greet you when you're at the bitter end	In the end he grabs you by the hand (like he used to, a long time ago) and everything just FREEZES and for a second you can feel your insides go COLD even your rage and you scream because (Iemitsu asked me not to kill you) (sorry everyone, I'll have to do this after all) the cold in his eyes it fucking terrifies you.

Download HERE (MF)
NOTE:
because I'm paranoiac, I changed the file extension from zip to zadp before uploading it.
to open the file, you must replace ".zadp" by ".zip".
If you don't see the file's extension, and you don't know how to display it in Windows, here's a tutorial.
Sorry for the inconvenience.